What actually is confidence?
Some think it's a talent, that only a select few are blessed with. (But how come, certain people start out shy and become extremely confident later on in their life?)
Other's think confidence is nothing more than acting unafraid. (But I think most of us have tried "acting" to be confident, which only works until the next small setback.)
So what is it? How do you actually gain confidence that sticks?
It seems like nowadays 9 out of 10 teenagers struggle with their self-confidence.
It's the #1 question that we get asked when player talk to us: How can I become more confident?
In a time, where we constantly compare ourselves to others through Instagram/Youtube/Facebook/Snapchat...it looks like our self-confidence is really taking a hit. Especially when everybody is portraying a fake image of themselves online that seems much better than it actually is.
But our brains can't seem to factor that in.
We think that if other people approve of us, then we will be confident and happy. That's where the whole "selfie culture" stems from - our self-worth is dependent on how many likes we receive.
The problem with that is, everybody is so concerned about their own self-image, they don't have time to approve of you and some might even try to bring you down in order to feel better about themselves.
So if you know that, you understand who foolish it is to depend on others for your self-confidence. You need to take care of it yourself.
And how do you do that?
You see, confidence, in other words, is the reputation you have with yourself.
Meaning if you always deliver on the things you set out to do, you will think very highly of yourself (as you would of another person).
This means, always write down exactly what you will do the following day so that you are able to measure whether you've actually delivered on your promises.
If you're able to do that consistently, it will already improve the way you see yourself.
But to really create unshakeable confidence, you need to do the second part of the equation.
And that is giving yourself credit for getting your work/training done.
Really reward yourself if you have completed all the items on your to-do list, as this will really train your mind to see work as an opportunity rather than a chore.
And it will constantly remind you how great of a job you are doing, which in turn will create the kind of confidence that is based solely on your own actions and on nothing external.